Having school-aged kids is a lot like being punk’d every.single.day. Does any of the following sound familiar?
- As I open my computer, the Roblox studio comes to life. Nothing else will open on my computer until I not only leave the website, but uninstall whatever malware Roblox is masking. I plug in my power cord, because the battery was left at 10 percent.
- As I set off on my commute, I reach to charge my phone, only to find the cord gone.
- After dinner, I get ready to wrap a gift for an upcoming birthday party. The tape and scissors are nowhere to be found.
- Later that evening, Netflix is suggesting some Pokemon episode based on my past viewing history.
Just a day in the life.
Many days I want to scream, QUIT TOUCHING MY STUFF!
Not that my little roommates would hear me, because they’ve borrowed both pairs of my ear buds. But if they were to feel the house vibrate from my bellowing voice, they’d probably look up and say, “What? I was just borrowing it.”
The number of dirty handprints has diminished in our home, but it’s still quite obvious kids live here.
You can tell mostly by our dead electronics, the empty milk carton in the fridge and cereal boxes that look like they’ve been opened by raccoons.
They thought I was overdoing it when I marked all of my personal charging devices with washi tape, but I looked at it as a low-tech Lo-Jack. You can deny taking my charger, but that pink polkadot tape tells me otherwise. Aha!
Of course, items shoved under beds and in the back of closets make the tape hard to see.
Based on these experiences, I went with a storyline I’m not proud of when I got a new iPad. I denied it.
Weeks before, I happened to bring home an iPad for an upcoming work trip. The kids clearly understood the iPad didn’t belong to me, but to work. No one but me could touch the iPad. It wasn’t even mine.
Enter the iPad that I won a few weeks later. I knew if I brought it home and claimed it as mine, it would fall to the fate of my Kindle, my earbuds and every charging cord I’ve ever owned.
So I lied. I bought a case identical to my Work iPad case. I said I was using it more for a certain project, so I was bringing it back and forth, but it was for Work. Four months and counting, it works like charm.
A mom has a to have a few secrets, right?