I would say 90 percent of the time, when I think about becoming a mom, I get genuinely excited.
I’ve always loved kids and I recently married, so the thought of an expanded family sounds exciting! But the 10 percent that isn’t excited has to do with the insane amount of criticism I see moms get, for the dumbest things.
Exhibit A: Nasty stares at Target for a shoeless little one
Today I came across a post that’s garnered some major attention on Facebook from a mom named Ashley. She runs a blog called Puzzle of Five, and last month, she vented about the nasty looks she receives for sometimes not having shoes on her kids at the store.
“I see you pulling out that hard judgement card, but I’m going to need you to go ahead and stick that back into your pocket,” she says. “Actually, just rip it up and throw it in the trash because you shouldn’t have it anyway.”
She goes on to talk about why her kid likely doesn’t have shoes on, even though it’s really none of anyone’s business.
“I’ve become extremely tired of realizing a shoe is missing and retracing my steps through Target to find it.
She then finishes her post by basically saying, thanks but no thanks:
“I thank you so much for your concern, but I got it. His feet are bare, but he is fine. He’s happy and I have some of my sanity in tact.”
Little self-righteous me
Look, I’m not going to pretend to be a perfect non-mom-shaming woman.
I’ll be totally upfront and honest right now and say whenever I see kids with popsicle stains or saliva and snot dripping from their mouths, I go into total bi*ch mode.
It completely grosses me out, and I’m sure I’ve handed out a mean look here and there. For that, I’m probably going to have allergy-ridden kids OBSESSED with Otter Pops. I deserve it.
But after working for a mom blog the past six months, I can see how totally ridiculous and rude it is to be so critical of moms just trying to do their best.
It’s important for us all to remember we see just one snapshot in time of a mom’s life with her kids.
You’re not seeing the whole picture
When we see a kid without socks and shoes, we probably aren’t seeing the kid throw them off the other five times earlier that day. We probably aren’t seeing the mom struggle with five million other tasks on her list. We probably aren’t seeing the mom pray for strength to just make it through without a mental break down .
There’s so much we don’t see. And we know that, deep down. So let’s stop judging the teeny bit that we do see.