The trainer who fat-shamed a bride-to-be is standing his ground

The trainer who fat-shamed a bride-to-be is standing his ground

Wellness

The trainer who fat-shamed a bride-to-be is standing his ground

Cassie Young and her fiancé. Credit: Cassie Young

If I were a trainer, I think the best possible way to approach a potential client would be to fat-shame them, don’t you?

NOT.

But, apparently, one trainer on Twitter never learned his manners, or you know … COMMON SENSE.

Cassie Young works in radio, social-media strategy and content creation.

She was recently proposed to (GET IT, GURL), and while she should have been celebrating and floating on cloud nine, instead, she was fat-shamed by a trainer who — get this — WANTED HER BUSINESS.

Credit: Giphy

Pretty much, the events unfolded like this

The trainer private-messaged Young, pitching $75-an-hour workout sessions.

He also mentioned his master’s degree and double-major undergrad degrees because everyone knows a college education entitles you to call out others on how you think they should live.

Young responded politely but firmly, saying, essentially, “Thanks, but no thanks.”

Credit: Sarah Witherington/OWN Boudoir Studio

The trainer wouldn’t take no for an answer, though, and proceeded to tell her if she didn’t hire him, she should hire someone. No, I’m not kidding. 

“I want you to look your best on wedding day,” he said.

Young then stated the obvious, that she’ll love how she looks come wedding day because she’s marrying the love of her life, AND SHE DESERVES HAPPINESS, DAMMIT.

OK, I added that last part, but we’re all thinking it. Plus, she does mention it in her Facebook re-cap of this entire conversation

Among many killer parts of Young’s responses (plural, because she literally had to tell him “no” so many times) was this:

“The idea of me being embarrassed by my wedding pictures because I might be ‘fat’ in them and people centuries from now will be ridiculing me? … I say Fu*k that noise! I plan on living the kind of life that will have people talking about how I lived it to my fullest and my legacy, not about the fact that I have a tummy.”

DAMMMNNNNN.

If you don’t have chills reading Young’s “legacy” drop, I feel like you’re probably dead inside.

That’s the kind of confidence we ALL need to muster. The world is tough. People don’t always have your back. But if we could get an ounce of her courage, I have a feeling we’d be just fine.

The trainer stands by his words

You might be thinking since this whole thing went down on Aug. 12, the trainer has had some time to reflect and correct the errors in his thinking.

Credit: Cassie Young

You’d be thinking wrong.

Instead, he’s sticking to his insults.

Young told AlltheMoms.com the trainer has reached out to her again since the story went viral to basically administer a quasi apology.

“He … told me that he finds shame is an effective motivational tool. … He keeps saying he likes having intelligent conversations, and he was never mean beyond what he had insinuated (which was that she was fat, by the way), but never nasty.”

“Unfortunately, I think he is a lost cause,” Young said.  

Credit: Cassie Young

 Young’s response to the trainer

Despite how devastatingly cruel and naive this trainer has been, Young has taken this as an opportunity to promote body positivity and support other women and men with similar struggles.

She’s also taking the high road, keeping the trainer’s name and profile out of public view. Maybe he was raised to believe what he does, she said.

I mean I was more thinking strap him to a raft and ship him into the ocean, “Parent Trap” style, but hey, to each her own. 

“I don’t have a vendetta against him. I don’t want his livelihood or career to get ruined … I believe in second chances. I’m not going to vilify the guy for his ignorance. I kind of feel like that’s what’s wrong with all the conversations we have on the internet these days. Everyone’s kind of at each other’s throats … How about a little kindness and compassion?”

Young’s right. This is a deep problem that everyone’s going to need to think a lot about to solve.

In all seriousness, I have a lot to say about this

So much so, actually, that I decided to annotate their conversation. Because yes, I’m that much of a nerd.

Read their conversation:

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