I want to cry.
I want to cry for every day I took a day off work just to clean house.
Yes, I did that. A few times. Because life is too short. And I like wasting life’s precious moments that way. Apparently.
But this guy, owner of No Idea What I’m Doing: A Daddy Blog, responded to the question about whether his wife won’t keep a cleaner house in the MOST AMAZING WAY.
The question came from his mother. Not in a snide way, he said in a Facebook post. More out of curiosity.
“Doesn’t it bother you that Mel won’t keep a cleaner house?” she asked him one Saturday.
You will want to cry
I want to cry, in part, because his response is just so darn awesome.
Clint Edwards, the Oregon father of three, said the marriage is a partnership and, as such, the care of the household is divided. Then, he admits: The house is untidy. Dishes in the sink. Half-finished art projects on the counters. Kid clutter here and there. Upon reflection, it doesn’t seem as clean as his mother’s house now or the homes of the Baby Boomer era he grew up in.
“I didn’t know my father all that well,” he continued in the post, “but I do remember him giving me this advice about picking a wife, ‘Stop by her house unexpected. See how it looks in there. You can tell a lot about a woman by how she keeps her house.’ ”
“I think my mother’s concern over a clean house has a lot to do with her trying to meet the expectations of her youth.”
Did you catch that? She was trying to meet the expectations of her youth.
So what’s my excuse? I was trying to meet the expectations of my mother — who may have just been trying to meet the expectations of her own youth. But who cares about that? Onto his amazing response.
What really matters?
“But the thing is, unlike my father I didn’t really think about a clean house when I married my wife. I thought about how I liked what she had to say. I thought about how she made me feel. I thought about how she smiled a lot. I liked that. I thought about how she was sweet and thoughtful, and how she seemed like the kind of mother I’d want for my children.
“After a few moments of struggling to find the right words, I finally said, ‘I didn’t get into this marriage for a clean house. I got into it because she seemed like someone I could spend my life with.’
“I put some dishes in the washer. Eventually mom said. ‘Well… that probably is more important than a clean house.’
Edwards agrees with his mother: “I think so too,” he tells her.
I’m way too old with three watchful children of my own to be living out the expectations of what may have just been my mother’s expectations to keep a tidy house. That’s the other reason I want to cry. I now consider myself schooled.
Thanks, Edwards and Edwards’ mom.
Now only happy tears for the best heart-squeezing response for a less-than-spotless home I have heard.