So comedian-actor Patton Oswalt is engaged, having found love with Meredith Salenger.
You would think that people could just be happy for the couple, given how much heartache Oswalt has endured over the past year.
His wife passed away in her sleep in April 2016.
But the internet being what it is, the masses quickly turned on Oswalt, offering their unsolicited advice and feelings about his engagement. Many of the comments were unbelievably nasty.
It’s shocking to me how so many people think they have license to have an opinion on someone else’s life – especially someone they’ve not even met.
I’ve two friends who are widows. Both lost their husbands suddenly and way too soon. One was in her 20s when her beloved passed. The other in her 30s.
Erica Roman, who lost her husband three days before Oswalt’s wife passed away, knows that kind of indescribable pain all too well. In her blog post, “A Woman’s Rage Defense of Patton Oswalt’s engagement,” she tell the trolls exactly what they can do with their unsolicited opinions.
“You aren’t entitled to an opinion. You don’t get to comment on the choices of a widower while you sit happily next to your own living spouse. You didn’t have to stand and watch your mundane morning turn into your absolute worst nightmare. You didn’t have to face the agony of despair and the only person who could possibly bring you comfort had been ripped from your life forever. You didn’t have to stand in the ashes of what was once your life, when the sun itself darkened and the very air you breathed felt toxic in your lungs. Go back to scrolling Facebook and keep your ignorance to yourself.”
She later adds:
“How long should a widow sit in isolation before YOU are comfortable enough to release them from their solitary confinement? Because it’s really about you isn’t it?”
The post has since gone viral on Facebook, and both Oswalt and Salenger have shared it, commending Roman for her articulate words and her bravery in speaking out.
“I felt this rage,” Oswalt notes in his own Facebook post.
Congratulations to Oswalt and Salenger on their engagement. And good for you, Erica, for lending strong words and a voice where it was needed.